In this book I chronicle my experience-at age forty-nine-when I recalled the sexual abuse by my father as a young girl. Through my journal entries, represented here verbatim, I share my journey to heal from the aftermath of this profound awakening. My story is one of survival. It follows the course of the first year of healing-from my psychotic break and diagnosis of PTSD and paranoia, through the flashbacks and memories, my disclosure to family, working through the grief process, and finally to acceptance and forgiveness. My story is one of survival and hope-one that will interest fellow survivors of sexual abuse, loved ones who want to help them, the recovery community, and those with a general interest in this subject.